STAR TREK - “SPOCK and the 24 HOUR CHALLANGE”

PRINCIPAL CHARACTERS:

KIRK: Captain of the USS Enterprise

SPOCK: First Officer; Science Officer

DR ‘BONES’ MCCOY: Chief of Medicine

SCOTT: Chief Engineer

SULU: Second Officer

UHURA: Communications Officer

CHECKOV: Weapons Officer and Computer Specialist

CHAPEL: Nurse

BOYD: Starfleet Admiral

STARDATE: 20080612.49

Scene 1: Bridge of the Enterprise, KIRK in the captain’s chair, SPOCK at his science console keying in a message for the rest of the bridge crew, for delivery to their personal consoles. Message reads:

“Dr McCoy coerced me into a medical trial he and Nurse Chapel are running. I need to wear sonic filters for a period of 24 standard hours. I’ll ensure this does not interfere with the smooth running of the ship, but if a RED ALLERT is activated please ensure I am aware of the situation”

SPOCK puts the sonic filters in his ears as per the instructions and hits the transmit button for his message.

KIRK having read the message swings round and looks at SPOCK

KIRK “Will you be able to pilot a shuttle craft at shift end safely, after all you do plan to return to your home on Vulcan this evening?”

SPOCK “Captain, people with hearing difficulties pilot shuttle craft regularly, I’ll take up more visual scanning and ensure I take my time.”

SPOCK {that was strange, KIRK’s voice is slightly muted, but mine is entirely different. Not to worry about this now I am scheduled to attend a symposium on ‘non-verbal communications techniques’}

SPOCK gets up from his console and walks towards UHURA, who also attends the communications symposium. Both enter the turbo-lift.

UHURA “Conference facility 4”

STARDATE: 20080612.51

Scene 2: Conference Facility 4. BONES and CHAPEL are already set-up, and are busy selecting an appropriate visual recording to use. BONES spots SPOCK and approaches him.

BONES “Are you using the sonic filters yet?”

SPOCK “Yes, Doctor I fitted them about fifteen minutes ago. I believe there is a problem as I am not experiencing the audio loss that I expected.”

BONES “You should have noticed a significant loss in audio receptive ability, perhaps try refitting the filters.”

SPOCK removes and refits both sonic filters.

UHURA “Mr Spock, the filters look like they are seated much better now”

SPOCK {I can still hear more than I expected, but the filters are correctly fitted and checked. Perhaps my Vulcan hearing is so acute there is little impact on my audio receptive ability!}

The rest of the symposium passes without issue. Returning to the Bridge SPOCK notices that various crew members are staring at him.

SPOCK {it’s the ears; the crew have never fully accepted my pointed Vulcan ears! After all what else could it be?}

STARDATE 20080612.58

Scene 3: Officers Mess, SPOCK & SULU are having a discussion at one of the tables. SULU is presenting progress reports on ship systems and planned improvements. SPOCK is in complete concentration and occasionally makes a few notes with his tricorder.

SPOCK {I find I need to give SULU my complete concentration or I miss what he is saying. Dam what did he say there?}

SPOCK “Sorry SULU what was that”

SULU “Mr SPOCK you are talking very quietly and carefully is something the matter?”

SPOCK “It’s these sonic filters I am wearing at the behest of DR MCCOY and NURSE CHAPEL, I cannot hear my own voice clearly. I have always been told that I have a voice that carries, so I have become paranoid about speaking to loudly, to such a degree that I have started to whisper.”

SULU starts to speak slower than usual, clearly pronouncing all of his words.

STARDATE 20080612.69

Scene 4: Aboard shuttlecraft. SPOCK is piloting, with CHECKOV in the co-pilot seat. CHECKOV has had a profound hearing loss from a young age and had also been attending the communications symposium series. Both are communicating using a one handed version (very occasionally two!) of the non-verbal communication method learnt at the symposium. It should be made clear that this only happens on the clear straight sections of the sky-lanes – Honest Guv!

STARDATE 20080612.74

Scene 5: After dropping CHECKOV at his condo SPOCK lands the shuttle on his personal shuttle pad and enters his home. After eating SPOCK decides to sit down and review a recording he had made earlier in the day.

SPOCK “Computer, activate vid screen and play recording labelled ‘TAGGART’”

COMPUTER “complying”

SPOCK struggling to follow the recording {I wish these recordings would encode the sub-titles and allow these to be viewed on playback.}

After 30 minutes SPOCK gives up and deletes the recording. SPOCK retires to the computer facility. He establishes a link with the Global Information Repository and starts to scan the information from that day’s news feeds; studying the latest developments on computer technology and software. The evening is rounded off by scanning for information on that ancient vid program Doctor Who.

STARDATE 20080612.96

Scene 6: Total Relaxation Facility. SPOCK is lying there reviewing a technical publication via his tricorder. At the same time music is being played via his antique ‘iPod’, the selected album is an all time favourite “Rubber Soul” by a popular beat combo known as ‘The Beatles’. A set of headphones are attached to the ‘iPod’ and placed over the top of the sonic filters.

SPOCK {this music is sounding very dull and lifeless, absolutely nothing like normal. Goodness if I get that Acquired Perceptive deafness, common in Vulcan’s when they reach 200 standard years, music is the thing I believe I will miss most of all.}

SPOCK continues to read and listen to the music as best he can before falling asleep.

STARDATE 200806123.25

Scene 7: Total Relaxation Facility – the next day. SPOCK is beginning to rouse, being helped along by a few head butt’s from the Cat named K9, 15. It is obvious that SPOCK is doing his best to ignore this non-verbal communication, known the universe over as ‘get up me hungry’ in cat. The ‘B-B-Beep’, ‘B-B-Beep’ of the alarm can be clearly heard, SPOCK is clearly not reacting to this. The alarm continues ‘B-B-Beep’, ‘B-B-Beep’.

SPOCK “K9 that’s enough, it will be time to get up soon enough. Huh! What’s that noise?”

SPOCK gently pushes K9 away and looks around the room, he looks in the direction of the alarm and a look of recognition comes across his face.

SPOCK “Blast it the alarm, shasbat!”

SPOCK quickly rises and heads of towards the shuttlecraft to collect CHECKOV and return to the Enterprise for their next work period.

Authors Note: Make it clear that SPOCK forgets to feed the cat in his haste. This will be followed up in my next submission to be titled “K9 turns nasty”.

STARDATE 20080613.30

Scene 8: Enterprise Bridge, ADMIRAL BOYD is on the viewer as KIRK is not available SPOCK must take the call. BOYD is an older gentleman with a short white moustache that he constantly rubs when speaking to people.

SPOCK “SPOCK here Admiral, how can I help”

BOYD “KIRK not back yet?”

SPOCK “No sir”

BOYD “Ok I’ll give you the details on the new computer system we are sending up to the Enterprise .................”

SPOCK has to maintain eye contact with BOYD and maintain his concentration. This look of pure concentration can clearly be seen on SPOCKS face.

SPOCK {Oh I wish he would stop playing with his moustache, I’m having a hard enough time following the detail of what he is saying without his discussing his lip pattern half the time. I’ve got the information but that was hard!}

BOYD “Discuss the details with KIRK and give me your assessment, BOYD out.”

STARDATE 20080613.60

Scene 9: Enterprise Bridge. SPOCK is sitting at the science console reviewing SCOTT’s report on engine performance and running the Earth simulation and weather prediction on the main-frame computer. Suddenly there is an alert signal, SPOCK automatically reaches over and hits the communications switch.

SPOCK “SPOCK here, report!”

UNKNOWN “Mumble, mumble, mumble”

SPOCK {Dam I can’t hear a blasted thing, sorry BONES but your trial must end now}

SPOCK removes the sonic filter. “Sorry please repeat your transmission”

SCOTT “MR SPOCK its SCOTT here we have a problem with one of the Dilithium Crystals”

SPOCK During conversation with SCOTT {Why is there loud music going on, are they having a party in Engineering? That’s highly illogical in an emergency situation.}

SPOCK “MR SCOTT I’ll expect a status update in 20 minutes”

SPOCK {Hang on a mo, the noise was not in Engineering it’s here on the Bridge. What is going on?}

SPOCK looks around the bridge; no one appears to be reacting to any disturbance. The noise is completely clear; the rest of the Bridge crew should be registering this. SPOCK looks thoughtful.

SPOCK {Wait a moment, the sonic filter experiment. Have I forgotten already the background noise of the ship and crew? But surely it was not this loud before..?”}

THE END

NOTE: It has never been discovered why this script submission of the second series (1968) was rejected during the pre-production process. Nor has it been possible to establish the true identity of this masterpieces’ author. Both of these mysteries have plagued Trekies for years and continue to be the source of frequent discussion at debate at Star Trek Conventions.

Live Long and Prosper!

July 2008